By Principal Lisa, Founder of Happy Families and The Potty Queen MethodTM

You may have heard of a Pikler Triangle. You may even have one in your playroom.

It's that beautiful wooden climbing frame that babies and toddlers love to explore.

But here's something I wish more parents knew.

Emmi Pikler's greatest contribution to childhood wasn't a piece of climbing equipment. It was a completely different way of seeing the child.

And her work has profoundly influenced the way I practise, the way I support families, and the philosophy behind both Happy Families and The Potty Queen Method.

Who was Dr Emmi Pikler?

Dr Emmi Pikler (1902–1984) was a Hungarian paediatrician whose pioneering work challenged many of the assumptions adults held about babies.

At a time when adults routinely positioned babies, helped them sit, stood them on their feet and encouraged them towards their next developmental milestone, Pikler asked a rather extraordinary question.

What happens when we stop trying to teach babies to move and give them the freedom to discover movement for themselves?

Her observations and work at the Lóczy infant institute in Budapest helped establish an approach built around freedom of movement, respectful caregiving, secure relationships and trust in the child's developing capabilities.

Pikler recognised that babies are not passive little beings waiting for adults to teach them everything.

They are active learners from birth.

You can find out more about her work at Pikler UK.

Why lying on their backs matters

One of Pikler's most important principles was allowing babies to begin exploring movement from a position they could comfortably maintain, usually lying on their backs, known as the supine position.

Think about what happens when a baby lies comfortably on a safe, firm surface.

They discover their hands. They turn their head. They lift their legs. They explore the relationship between their body and the space around them.

Over time, they begin to turn, roll, pivot, reach and move.

Each discovery belongs to them.

Rather than repeatedly placing a baby into sitting or standing positions they cannot yet achieve independently, the Pikler approach encourages us to give them time, space and opportunities to develop their own movement.

This isn't about doing nothing.

It's about creating the right environment, observing carefully and knowing when to step in and when to allow a child to explore.

And that requires enormous trust.

Why I'm passionate about freedom of movement

We live in a world full of baby equipment.

Bouncers, rockers, seats, walkers, swings and all sorts of wonderful-looking contraptions promising to entertain, soothe or develop our babies.

And while some equipment has a practical place in family life, I often encourage parents to ask themselves a simple question.

How much time does my baby actually spend being free to move?

Pikler encouraged adults to avoid unnecessarily restricting babies' movement or placing them into positions they couldn't yet achieve themselves.

That doesn't mean you must never carry your baby, cuddle them or use a carrier when you need one.

It means recognising that babies also need regular opportunities for unrestricted movement and exploration.

Sometimes the most valuable thing we can offer a baby isn't another piece of equipment.

It's a safe space on the floor, time to explore and an adult who trusts them.

Then came Magda Gerber and RIE

Magda Gerber worked alongside Emmi Pikler in Hungary and was deeply influenced by her respectful approach to infant care.

After moving to the United States, Gerber went on to co-found Resources for Infant Educarers, known as RIE, in 1978.

RIE took these principles of respect, observation, freedom of movement and trust in the infant and helped make them accessible to parents and educators.

And it wasn't simply about how babies move.

It was about how we speak to them, how we touch them, how we change their nappies, how we feed them and how we involve them in their own care.

Rather than doing everything to a baby, we begin doing things with them.

We tell them what is happening. We allow time for a response. We invite their participation.

Even the youngest baby deserves to be treated as a person.

That might sound obvious today, but it was a remarkable shift in thinking.

What has this got to do with potty learning?

Everything!

When I work with families, I don't see a child who needs to be trained to perform a task on an adult's timetable.

I see a developing human being who is learning to understand their body, recognise sensations, communicate their needs and gradually take responsibility for their own care.

These are skills.

And skills develop through opportunities, experience, encouragement and respectful support.

This is why I talk about capability, not readiness.

A child who has been invited to participate in their care from infancy has had opportunities to experience cooperation, body awareness, communication and autonomy.

During nappy changes, we can explain what we're doing, invite the child to help, allow them to participate and respect their growing independence.

As they become toddlers, those same principles can guide how we introduce the potty and support toileting.

We don't need to frighten, bribe, shame or pressure children into learning.

We can provide the environment, teach the skills, observe their responses and support their progress.

Potty learning is something we do with a child, not something we do to a child.

Why I chose to become a RIE practitioner

After decades of working with babies, toddlers, parents and educators, I have become increasingly convinced that some of the most powerful things we can offer children are also the simplest.

Time. Respect. Freedom. Observation. Trust.

My RIE Foundations training and work as a Respectful Infant Care Practitioner have deepened the way I understand children's development and the relationships that support it.

This philosophy influences everything I do, from observing a baby exploring movement to helping a toddler learn to use the potty, or supporting a nursery team to rethink how they approach everyday care.

I don't believe our role is to constantly hurry children towards the next achievement.

I believe our role is to understand what they are already capable of, create opportunities for learning and offer the support they need.

And perhaps, most importantly, to recognise that childhood isn't a race.

Children don't need us to do everything for them. They need us to believe in what they can learn to do for themselves.

That is the legacy of Emmi Pikler and Magda Gerber that I carry into my work every single day.

With love,

Principal Lisa

Founder, Happy Families with Principal Lisa and The Potty Queen MethodTM

RIE Foundations trained | Respectful Infant Care Practitioner | Early Years Educator

Gentle potty training help in Dubai and the UAE

If you'd like calm, respectful potty training support for your toddler, here is where to start:

• Take the free Potty Capability Check to see what your child can already do.
• Book a free 15 minute Calm Plan Call and tell me about your child.
• Book 1:1 potty training help, on video or at home in Dubai and across the UAE.
• Learn at your own pace with The Potty Queen MethodTM course.